'Where The Wild Things Are' videos (1973 and 2009)

To be honest, I've blogged about this before, but it's worthy of blogging about again.

The book Where The Wild Things Are is a must have for any one's personal book collection, period.

If you know someone who just had a baby, then be the first person to add this treasured book to that child's library.

It's a classic's classic.

It put the book's author, Maurice Sendak, right up front and center regarding children's literature and raised the bar so much higher for every other illustrator and author for the rest of all time.

Embedded here in this blog post are two different video versions of this groundbreaking illustrated classic.

The first one is a video of "Where The Wild Things Are" which you probably had to watch on rainy days at school in the "Media Center." (If you are my age, they called that place a "library" and it's where they kept all those clunky things we call books, today.)

The first video was made in 1973. And it's not terrible at all. In fact, it's actually wonderful in a slightly washed-out, beatnik-y kind of way.




However, from what I hear, the newest film adaptation of this same book, Where The Wild Things Are which is set to open October 16th, 2009, is going to blow us away.

Below is a trailer for this Spike Jonze version of "Where The Wild Things Are."

What?! When does it open?! October???!


So, here's my second clip which is the trailer for the Spike Jonze version of Where The Wild Things Are.




OMG. I can already tell I'm going to cry and fall madly in love with this movie.


(See? I called it "a movie." This proves I have high hopes for it.)

I. Can't. Wait.

'Wait for me.' A love story

So sad, but a love story, nonetheless.

Flight of the Conchords

Bret and Jemaine
The duo rocked out at the 'Flight of the Conchords' Concert at The Greek (Not Roman) Theater up in Los Angeles last night.

The deadpan, dorky duo, The Flight of the Conchords, proved themselves to be as funny, if not funnier in person, and much, much better musicians than I ever expected. They're really great.

I thought the show really came alive when they literally moved for their sets. Like, got up and moved about the stage, or reacted to unexpected antics from the audience. The energy level was a bit more sedate than I anticipated.

If I have any one complaint it is that they seemed a bit too nailed to the spots where they played.



Since the joke was often extremely deadpan, and often lost in a New Zealand accent, I fear that by not providing visual explanations in order to underscore their "irony," that a bit of the humor became lost in translation.

Very good musicians and vocalists, though. Really.

They mocked all of us Americans, for confusing Greeks with Romans, which I think they discovered wasn't exactly a great laugh factory move, when you already sound smarter than we do.

However, their "David Bowie" voice was amazing.

And we all, took a gander at their "package" toward the end of the show. It was impossible not to.

All in all it was a great show under the stars, and we had amazing seats.

I especially enjoyed the two American stand-up comics, Eugene Mirman and Arj Barker who did a great job of opening the show for them.

I thought their material was original, fresh and a very good set ups for FOTC. Great energy from both.

I really liked them quite a bit, actually. I think Eugene Mirman is very gifted and I am hoping to hear more from them both soon.

Oh, that was me giving Mirman a "shout-out" for "Western Mass."

Yeah, it kind of surprised me, too. I don't actually live there, but I wish I did. Does this count?

Can you cheer for a place you've liked even though you didn't actually live there? I didn't read how to handle this in my audience handbook.

But, that's a very cool area. Every year when I drive through Western Mass (Northampton, Amherst, Greenfield, etc...) on my way to visit my parents in Southern Vermont, I always wished I did lived there. So, I shouted out to the 'Louise' who lives there in an alternative universe.

And I especially like it more now that Mirman's confirmed that they've closed Linens 'N Things. He's right, it's all their fault. They should have been much more specific.

Anyhow -- Great show last night. And even better was seeing my childhood friend "Beeper" (Yes, that is her unofficial name.) and her family for dinner beforehand in their lovely So. Masselin Street home in LA.

Meet "Beeper."


Beeper and I go way, way back. When she was 3 and I was 4 or 5. Beeper, and her very funny older brother, Jay, and I were the kind of friends that evolved because our parents spent a great deal of (party) time together, over the years.

I think of all the friends I still socialize with since birth, she may be the one I've known the longest. I met her before starting Kindergarten when our moms worked at Yale Library in 1966-7. And "only kids" like myself, take this kind of personal history seriously.

It was only a year we lived there, but New Haven at that time was a trip. Then the weekend trips to Yale from VT through the sixties and seventies were highly memorable, too. She's pretty much been my "adopted" little sister for the past 43 years.

Remind me to write about the day my very Episcopal parents decided to baptize (then, heathen) Beeper when we were in middle school. That was interesting.

In any event...

Now, we have four daughters between us through which we get to relive all the horrors and joys of growing up all over again!

As usual the men move into the TV room to watch sports while the girls laugh and show off our bums.

The Ladies:




The Gentlemen:



It really was a very good day.

Oh, yeah. Tonight's "Business Time" with Flight Of The Conchords

Tonight Pete's got (writing a review for the Orange County Register) tix to see our top all-time favorite comedy singing duo "Flight Of The Conchords" for tonight's show at Los Angeles's Greek Theatre!

-- Oh, yeah!

In fact, all day has been a "red letter day."

Woke up, the kids were happy, so I took a long bath! I never do that.

We're planning to spend lazy afternoon at my favorite childhood friend's house up in LA and then go to what I can only predict will be one of the funniest music concerts, ever.

Yes, we're going to hear Bret and Jemaine rockin' us under the stars at the Greek Amphitheater. Sweet!

Yes!

'I Can't Believe I'm Still Single': Miami meets Chicago

Newsflash to man in show (Schaeffer) professing to want to get married and have children.

Sunday will SO not be about you anymore. No day will be about you anymore. Get your brain around that.

If you cannot handle this fact then just give up this fruitless search.

In this week's episode of "I Can't Believe I'm Still Single" Mr. Eric Schaeffer and his motley crew (Clearly Em and Stas are exempt) travel from Kalamazoo to Chicago.

This episode's date was with a woman who from Miami who agreed to fly to Chicago for her on-air date with Eric.

Review: One half star: For not making me want to vomit as many times as he has previously.

Here's what happened in this episode of "I Can't Believe I'm still Single."

Blonde from Florida meets Eric Schaeffer on MySpace .

She agrees to fly out to Chicago for a date with Eric Schaeffer.

During her introduction at his hotel room she rolls about his bed like a drunk Pomeranian and spanks him with a riding crop.

Mark Ebner drooled over her, from his spot on the floor.

Eric drooled, too.

Eric takes blonde to a romantic dinner at an Italian restaurant in Chicago where he mooches free meals from them for his "date." (Which was a lot more than his Kalamazoo date got.)

No kissing at the hotel door. (So, that way she knows he really cares about her. Cuuuuuuute.)

Eric makes ritual offering of Nemos-Scat bar and she accepts it.

Roll credits.

Done.


If this poor woman's voice alone were not enough to send you straight up the wall, then for me the deal -breaker was her long mink coat. Nope. Done. No fur wearing allowed.

Real fur is unacceptable in my book on any human, let alone one as stupid as that woman.

I saw his eyes light up when she showed up with her big breasts, bleached blond hair, uber white teeth, fake tan and shiny floor length mink coat.

It made sense to me that his brain didn't want someone like her, but his body did.

It was kind of obvious given the lascivious way Eric licked his lips when watching her speak even though it creeped me out.

(He really does lick his lips in a way that's really just gross. Does he not know this is gross? It is.)

Maybe it is a match made in heaven, if he can just reconcile that he really wants someone like her deep down.

Truthfully, they seemed to enjoy each other a great deal.

However, sadly, the show was still pretty boring. Mercifully we're almost done with this series, aren't we?

I didn't hate the woman, because I'm sure she's nice in her own way, but I think anyone that hung-up on looking so plastic isn't someone I understand very well.

And wearing fur is gross.

I got the impression Eric looked down on her, for a variety of reasons, however the truth was his face was pretty lit up by her petite blondeness.

However, it's simply impossible to tell what the reality really was since editing hides so much in these shows.
So, go figure.

I will say this.

I give Eric Schaeffer major props for mentioning wanting to save the baby orphan elephants.

I blogged about this before, it's such an amazing cause. These tiny little baby elephants are orphaned and they need help, and they are heartbreakingly sensitive and amazing and...I can't take abandoned kid stories at all, let alone baby elephant stories. If I talk about it, I'll cry.

But, if you want to do something wonderful on this planet, visit this link, here, and donate to The Orphans Project. We're all hurting due to this economy, but I'm willing to bet these little guy's fates are even more threatened due to poachers, now, and less support than before our "economic downturn."

This is something worth supporting. Trust me.

And he also mentioned wanting to help needy kids right here at home. I agree with all the things he said he'd want to do if he couldn't "make movies." He picked good causes to support.

This is where I get all messed up wanting to hate him, but then he goes an mentions a cause(s) which happen to be near and dear to my heart and I have to say...well, that makes up for a lot of things I've condemned him for till now.

Wanting to help orphaned elephants makes up for a whole lot of...lip licking.

Below is a promo trailer for his show, again.

Based on the faces we see in it, it's clear we have maybe one or two more women to meet before good old Mark Ebner and Eric...choose a wife???

I guess you could say this is like a very, very low-tech version of "The Bachelor."

Basicially, he needs to find a Barbie doll on the outside with a vegan hippie-chick on the inside, but the problem is: I don't think that woman really exists. Mostly because, Barbie doesn't exist.

That's a problem. It's like waiting to meet the Easter Bunny. It just ain't gonna happen.

Louise on the Left's Cliff Notes for the research-challenged Liberal Progressive Californian

Louise on the Left's Cliff Notes for the lazy California Liberal Progressive.

For those of us with busy lives and not enough time to research things fully, here are a few more links re: endorsements and recommendations regarding the California Special Elections May 19th, 2009.

Also, the election? It's today
Like, Tuesday, May 19th, today


-- Later that day --

So, my husband I have been clicking around and STILL have been talking about what the right way to vote really is. It's confusing.

He said "none of them will pass."

I said "so, why don't we save them?" (I suddenly felt sorry for them. Like they'd been left at the animal shelter.)

He said, "Well, because that first link you put up suggested not to."

I asked him to recap for me why that was.

He reminded me one of my first links was to a progressive group that urged people to vote "no" on all of them.

"Why?" I asked, clearly still confused by it all.

He finally explained it in a way that made sense to me.

"To force the Sacramento fat cats go back to the drawing board and raise taxes on the top wealthiest people, that's why. Because that's the only way to really fund all of the things we really care about, like education and health care."

"Oh, yeah. I forgot. Ha."

So, let me explain it out a bit more clearly:

Because in reality these specific propositions wouldn't do much more than make a tiny dent in our still huge deficit, and if the props fail in this special election, then, we (self-described "progressives") hope it might force Sacramento to accept that they are finally desperate enough to change our state tax-and-budget system (including raising taxes on the wealthiest 2% of the population) and then, and only then finally start to fix this problem we have every year.

Okay, so -- back to some links so you can make up your own minds...

Here's a link to LAProgressive's Endorsements

Here's a link to California Democratic Party endorsements

And the Los Angeles County Democratic Party endorsements

Links to several California Voter Guide(s) Nonpartisan clearinghouse of special election info & links

Link to the Courage Campaign -- Which was actually my first post on this topic, which started it all.


Good luck & hope Louise & Pete sort-of helped you figure things out.

Looking for a great Pop-Culture reporter in New England?

If you are, please contact me. All I ask is that you live away from the Pacific Coast and it's shifty plate movements.

In return for your interest I'll send you an amazing resume of someone (aka, my husband) very talented whose wife is dying to relocate to the east coast.

To be honest, for the past 14 years I've endured the longest act of holding my breath ever achieved.

Why? Well, because we are a family of four and having one of us employed with benefits is necessity and (as far as I'm concerned.) mostly the only thing that's keeping us (Okay, me.) out here in Southern California.




But, for the record, I've said it before, and I'll say it again, but I absolutely hate earthquakes. Seriously, hate them. I hate them.

Last night, after a long day of having great Fairy-Garden-Birthday-Party fun, we collapsed down to eat dinner and relax only to hear "tick, tick, tick (the sound always starts in the same place. As a rattle way high up in the same corner of the family room.) Then --- RUMBLE, RUMBLE, (big rolling lurch) SHAKE, SHAKE, BOOM, BANG!"

Earthquake.

I yelled "Get into the hallway. Now!"

Earthquake. I felt like the house was in an elevator dropping quickly. My hands shook. My knees shook. I moved to the hallway wall with no pictures on it and eyed the front door. I wanted us out of there.




My kids followed me, through all this. But, not my husband. He sat there. Refusing to be suckered into reacting at all. He's sooo over earthquakes.

His sullen refusal to move was the way he always deals with disaster. He becomes intractable. Stuck.

Finally, he moved slowly off the sofa with a deliberate, calculated "Oh, please! I refuse to buy into your crazy belief that this could be a danger to us" attitude.

So, I did what anyone would do: I took my kids to the car and stayed there for well over an hour.



Tell me again, why do people live here?


It's like Jack's Giant fell out of the beanstalk then, inexplicably decided to go cloggin'. Or, like the fictional ghost train, The Polar Express suddenly exploded right through your living room, on it's way to snag kids to see Santa.

I'd almost say "without warning," but, we all know that's not true. We have had plenty of warning.

Some of us heed it, some of us don't. Try having a foot in both camps...

For the record, I'd like to state that nobody else had a problem moving into the van with me last night, except my husband.

The dog had no problem following me into the minivan, either. But, my husband? Nope. That's for sissies.

He came out for about 5 minutes then went inside to catch up on his fantasy baseball while his wife was in tears because she hates these earthquakes so much.

Earthquakes are for single people, not mothers.

Any mother that wants to live here? Forget them, they are bad mommies.

They fail the "safe mommy" test. Take it from me, California can be very scary.



So, I refused to put my kids back into their own beds.



I despise and loathe the earthquakes. This one was only a 4.7 out near LAX. On the "Newport Inglewood Fault" which, AM 1070 said (we heard out in the van.) was actually capable of 7.5 or greater. Oh, good.

Seriously, if there were anyway to justify moving to New England, I would.

I love weather. I love blizzards and thunderstorms. No Like The Earthquakes.

I feel like I will die if I have to live through anything like the Northridge Earthquake, again.

I thought we'd die, and that was BEFORE we had kids. Now?

I can't bear the thought of my kids being crushed under anything.

We had a lesser quake last summer at our house and many of our books fell down.

My dog bounced off the walls in panic. Yelping and tearing through the house. Pandemonium. I totally got how he felt.

And these last two weren't even supposed to matter.

What terrifies me is all the talk that "we are overdue for the big one."

Great.

"Overdue."

Choosing to live here is no brighter than running across the freeway on a dare.

Owning real estate here is like juggling with a blindfold on.

You might get some insurance money back, but you probably won't. You treasure your things? Well, they might be buried in rubble one day, soon. We are "overdue."


So, if you know of any publishing company (preferably in New England, but will take anything east of the Rockies) needing a great pop-culture writer: Have I got a reporter for you!

Like I said, I'm happy to send you the resume. Express mail.

Here I am below, with my kids, and my dog all driving to Vermont, wisely fleeing the "Big One."

Television Confessions: Shows I love and adore.

Okay, I'm not proud of this fact, but I love my television shows.

And, I can't believe I haven't blogged this before, but I wanted to share what my particular favorite shows are, in case anyone else shares the same addictions and wants to chat about how wonderfully awful they are.

First of all there's the reality TV:

Celebrity Apprentice, Wife Swap, Trading Spouses, plain old Apprentice, Survivor, Top Chef, Project Runway, I Can't Believe I'm Still Single (Yes, that really is what it's called.) America's Next Top Model, My Life On The D-List, and, as always, for my Friday night date with Pete, we have to watch Bill Maher.

As for non-reality TV I adore, love and can't enough of Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Californication, Sex and The City, Extras (love Ricky Gervais) and...gosh, there has to more than that, isn't there? There used to be on HBO, but those dang series shows keep running out of episodes. I'm still really upset about Six Feet Under.

In fact, the day before yesterday as I was preparing my "fairy garden-birthday party" for my daughter's festivities (tomorrow! Ahh!) I was overwhelmed by a six-lane freeway of ants in the kitchen. I tried to wipe them away, again, and again. They just poured into my kitchen from seemingly nowhere, to march, seemingly also nowhere and I couldn't make them stop. I started begging with the ants to please take their party elsewhere. They ignored me. They taunted me. I pleaded with them. "What is it you seek, oh ants?"

Then -- it came to me. I was making little houses and toadstools for my kid's birthday party and chatting with the ants: I had become "Lisa" from Six Feet Under.

Momentarily. Then I got out the boric acid and got all "Brenda" on their asses.

God, I miss that show.

That show did change my life. It revolutionized how I thought about writing. Anything goes if it's authentic. If you can make something authentic, you can write about anything you want, and someone, somewhere will understand you.

How cool is that?

(Alan Ball: One day I want to meet you & thank you in person for making me aware of this.)

I did enjoy "The United States of Tara," but never finished watching it. I should, I liked it a lot.

Any suggestions for me? I know my husband Pete's heavily into 24, Heroes, The Office, Chuck, 30 Rock (the last two, actually, I have come to love, but it took a while.)

Oh, how could I forget? Of course, and American Idol, but my kids and husband (Pete) had to twist my arm to make me watch it until I was firmly hooked. It wasn't like I had much choice in the matter for the past few years. However, I enjoy it, now. I enjoy hearing what Simon has to say, because it's usually precisely what I think. I like his merciful honesty.


So, these are my high brow obsessions: I can't help myself. I've gone to the dark side.

Eric Schaeffer Goes to Kalamazoo via Hell

Hell, for us, that is.

How is this is a show at all?

What? Watching me do the dishes has got to be more interesting than watching this guy's road trip. Who paid him to do this???! Are they being held at gunpoint to air this crap?


I mean, really. I promised I'd review every episode, so here's my review du jour.

It stank.

I thought he was actually even more annoying than I have previously thought possible.

Note to Hertz Auto Rentals: Sue this guy, please. I do NOT want to rent a van for my family once someone as reckless and filthy as this guy has had his way with your vehicles. I will never use Hertz to rent a car ever again. I might get Schaeffer's skankmobile.

I would have strangled him before they left the parking lot in Canada even before they drove and drove and drove for no reason other than Eric Schaeffer is a total infantile egomaniac who cannot follow directions. Attractive, I know.

Could Schaeffer really get much more disgusting than he was up in that Canadian parking lot? Je ne sais pas.

Okay: Mark and Eric are pigs. That's my review. That show was just one long, boring bus ride to the most dismal corner of the universe with the grossest jerks in the world.

Zero stars for this show.

The woman and her child they visit in Kalamazoo were just both so sad. Lonely. Eric freaked out by having to deal with a little boy who did not want to share his mom with anyone, let alone as weird and gross as Eric Schaeffer. Can you blame him?

But, the really desperate moment of that date's was when she excuses herself to return dressed in a Batgirl outfit.

Yuck. Then she got the old "shuck and you-know-what." How humiliating.

"Thanks, Batgirl. Here's a scat bar I may not even want to see again, but you can have this stupid piece of fattening junkfood if and only if I deem you worthy enough. Bye. I hate your kid."

Bad show. Boring. Skanky.

Tyra "wha-whas" ANTM contestant right out the game

Oh, my God!

I can't believe she did it the first time, but twice in a row?!

Tyra is much scarier than Simon in this sort-of thing. Wow.

Skip to time in clip - 6:06


And then, Holy Moses, poor Aminat -- after taking such a patronizing beat down from Tyra ends up losing anyway -- because of "her face."

Brutal.


I don't think my girls get to watch this show anymore. As entertaining as it is for me, the way these women allow themselves to be judged seems deeply demeaning to all women. I mean, if these gorgeous young things "can't make it," what chance do real girls have?

Tyra tells America's Next Top Model her face is "wha-wha."

Okay, so I never started out as an America's Next Top Model fan, yet somehow we started watching it and now, well, I enjoy it because it's so campy and bizarre. I dislike the message it sends women, however I've become mesmerized by the spectacle of it all.

I do love the way Tyra runs her hen house. I'm amazed that a former super-model so effortless has become such a powerhouse. She's so dramatic and over-the-top. Very entertaining delivery.

However, my favorite moment last week was when Tyra narrowed the final two to two models, Aminat and Celia. Then, Tyra shares this career observation with the runner up.

"...Pretty girl! But, there's something about the mathematics of your face when it comes to how the light hits it in a photo that sometimes is genius and sometimes is wha-wha."

"Wha-wha??! Can you imagine having Tyra tell you this to your face?

OMG! This so makes me laugh everytime.

Here it is: America's Next Top Model Cycle 12 Episode 12 Elimination. ("wha-wha" is at 2:41 secs)

Kind of a long clip, but, worth it.

American Idol New Rules

First of all, I admit I'm mad because Allison should have stayed in the game and Danny should have gone home last week.

No Doubt (who impressed me by NOT lip synching last week) Allison and Adam should have been chosen for the final duel on American Idol.

But, for the record, here are

LOUISE'S AMERICAN IDOL NEW RULES

#1: Sorry, but Adam is not allowed to win American Idol if every high note he hits makes him look like a regurgitating iguana.

Everyone knows he can sing his ass off. Especially, Adam. But he needs to drop the Liza Minelli drag act for at least one song, as well as hit high notes without sticking his tongue out like that. It's gross.

Why the hell doesn't he just do a Heart song? That is who he sounds like.

And #2. And Danny cannot sing a bet-you-think-I'm-singin'-bout my-dead-wife song to win. Also, he appears smug and it bugs me.

Kris can stay in the game if he continues to seem humble and continues picking interesting songs to cover like the Kanye West song.

And Kara is too annoying to judge anyone. Vote her off the island.

Simon is right.

New rules.

Survivor Tocantins & the Delusional Passion of Coach

Okay. So, now that I'm on a roll, here, fessin' up my current television obsessions, I can't leave out this season's Survivor Toncantins with the entirely wacked-out, uber-creepy, drama queen, "Coach."

Who, thanks to great editing, quips such profound lines as,

"...And, I just wanted to share a piece of my life with them. I just wanted to show them that no matter how bad it gets in your life there's always something that's gonna make it much worse."

Uhm. Thanks?

Here's Coach sharing another inspiring story with the gang around the campfire, the one about the time he got in the Amazon.



Memo from Central Casting:

Seeking aging dragon slayer to star in Charles Manson bio-pic. Soccer coaching and mental masturbation a plus.

By the way, what was so bad about poor Sierra?

Welcome to Island Lord-of-the-Flies.

Celebrity Apprentice "Beyond white trash." Yes!

Dang! -- How about that last bitch fight on "The Celebrity Apprentice?"

That was great TV.

Bamboo Nation (who blogs about this and so many other topics with far more skill than I.) loved the line "Whore pit vipers!" which, let's face it, is an easy sound bite to swoon over, but I actually have a few other "favorite moments" from that show to weigh in on, too.

First of all -- whew! Happy Mothers Day? And how about that mother and daughter team?

I love how loyal they are. It doesn't matter what they're pissed about, or why, but I just love that they'd go to the mat for each other like that. No. Matter. What. Do not mess with the mothers and their daughters. Never. You will be shredded.

My favorite lines:

Joan Rivers: (to Brande Roderick and Annie Duke): "And you?! You give money with blood on it. I met your people in Vegas for forty years and none of them have last names! None of them!
You're a poker player. A pokah playah! -- That's beyond white trash."

Annie Duke: (In whiny, nasal voice) "Poker players are the most awesome people in the world."

Joan Rivers: "Poker players are trash, dahling!" (Exit, Joan.)

Well, see for yourself.



Donald Trump knows how to crank out gold from crap. You have to hand it to him for casting great "The Celebrity Apprentice" shows.

Eric Schaeffer Goes to Canada

Okay, I'm on the hook. I said I'd try to give an "un-review" of every episode of this guy's show.

So, this week on Season Two of "I Can't Believe I'm Still Single," we saw Eric and his road crew finally make it across the border to Canada. Literally. We saw them drive over the border.

Hmmm. No, really. What happened in the last episode? I can't remember...

Nothing? I kind of think, sort-of nothing much really happened.

This week there were no "date scenes" just really uninspiring road trip chatter. They all agreed that they still liked Allison, the Burlington, VT date, a lot and even phoned her to tell her the food she enabled Eric with was good "after all."

Okay, there was a visit with his Dad and his stepmom in Canada. Which was what he described as a good visit and yet, inexplicably, made Eric cry because it brought up stuff that made him feel things.

(Real life does that sometimes.)

Eric shared with us more pathology of being a very scary food addict.

So, anyway, after talking our ears off with, what really can only be described as endless, useless banter they finally found some skuzzy hotel for he and his little road crew.

Then he and his chubby sidekick, Mark, immediately set about calling escort services to find out where to go to the nearest "whore house." (What a surprise, it was across the parking lot! Quelle coincidence!)

Apparently, he and Mark go way back and used to shoot up and/or go to brothels in the past, I can't quite figure it all out, but they seemed to be nostalgic for completing some kind of whoring activity together.

Which is, what I think, all men do when they are seeking true love, they troll escort services for finding out where the whores are, right?

They also used funny names for "whores" which sort-of sounded like the name "whores," but wasn't really the actual word "whore." So, funny.

Yep, the final episode shot of the two "boys" scampering across the parking lot over to the "whorehouse" was really cute.

I don't know, I'm not 14 so I didn't really get the humor in any of this episode.

To me it seemed just plain underwhelming and tedious. When it wasn't being gratuitously "deep" to counter the gratuitous sleeze.

That's my episode review.

Believe me, I wish it were more interesting, too.

Links to several California Voter Guide(s) Nonpartisan clearinghouse of special election info & links

California Online Voter Guide: Links to Ballot measures info
Click on the tab(s) above to enter the California Online Voter Guide, a nonpartisan clearinghouse of election information and web site links. This edition covers statewide ballot measures.


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One more site to use while catching up on your voter homework regarding the California special elections.

Check out the LAist Voter Minute Guide to May 19th's Elections!
The LAist voter guide: California May 19 Special Election:
(Includes short instructional videos on each ballot measure. Short, clear and specific short videos on the pros and cons of each new ballot measure coming up for election for our special California election on May 19, 2009. )

INCOMING! - a silent movie ~ by Lucy Pepper

Here's how (my new favorite artist) Lucy Pepper introduces her film short:

"a story you'll know quite well if you've lived on this planet for more than a week.

If you are new to this planet, then you'll need to understand that there's nothing we like better than a POSSIBLE crisis"

Bristol's blessing & curse. Talking to kids about sex.

Here's how yesterday's Palin-style Abstinence Tour sounded to Gawker (link here.)

And how it appeared to Keith Olbermann --





But, it got me thinking -- Is Bristol Palin a really a good role model? For what? Abstinence or more sex education?

Wow. More mixed messages Palin style, this time they use Bristol to promote more useless conservative propaganda.

I watched several of her interviews this week and here's how I heard her:

"Sex is a blessing and a curse. No, I mean, the baby part. It's a curse not just a blessing."

"No...Uh, the other way. "

"Look, my Mom and Dad made me do this interview, I don't really even care what other teens do, I just know I have to say all this to you, so puh-leez, do not make me think on top of it all, okay? Because I'm a real mom now, and it's hard! And this baby isn't just an accessory on my hip. Okay?"

Yeah, so yesterday Gawker posted a pretty great round-up of yesterday's really peculiar press tour of Bristol Palin telling other teens to skip the birth control, not have sex.


So, what I'm wondering is this -- Is this message to "at risk" teens supposed to be successful in preventing more teen pregnancies? If so, why?

The baby was a "bad thing?" Well, she looks more supported and grounded now with this cute little baby in her arms than she ever did before. Her dad is sitting to her paying her lots of attention during her confessional tell-all moment. Her family is suddenly a huge part of her everyday life. They sure weren't during the campaign, so, this attention and new found maturity is bad?

In fact, why IS Bristol's dad, Todd Palin, such a presence on his daughter's "Sex Leads to Bad Things, Just Not This Baby" Tour?

By the way, didn't George Michael already record a song about this?

"Abstinence is natural - Abstinence is good
Not everybody does it
But everybody should
Abstinence is natural - Abstinence is fun
Abstinence is best when it's....one on one"

Oh, wait. No....

Hmmmm. Wait a minute: Let's recap, here:

Bristol said while pregnant that abstinence does not work. Actually, I think here words "unrealistic."

Now, she says abstinence is the only way to fight teen pregnancy -- pregnancy, which ruined her life, except it isn't really ruined, because she loves her baby so much and life is good. (Confused yet?)

Let's see....If I were a really confused teen who wanted more love and attention in my life, wouldn't Bristol's new life actually appear pretty appealing right now? I think it would. Look at the way Todd Palin looks at her, now....which is kind of odd, actually -- is his supposed to be a "doting" look or, what? Where's his wife?

Anyhow, let's face it, teens mostly get pregnant because the didn't tell the guy to pull out in time, not in an organized plot to get more parental attention.

Hello? Trigger or Tripp or Tag (Tigger?) or whatever that poor baby's name is, is here not just because his clearly dopey parents "did it" without a condom (or thought). But, really, that baby is here now mostly because the teenagers who conceived him had a whole lot of unsupervised free time to conceive that baby.


Point noted: I guess next time I run for president, I'll make sure my kids have someone to drive them to and from soccer practice and see they are sleeping (alone) at home at night.

I mean, you know why teens get pregnant? Because they got horny and it felt really, really good and they didn't expect to be so carried away by things.

Truthfully, all those awkward, useless "Family Unit" classes they teach you starting in fifth grade NEVER address the obvious, which is --


-- "Sex is gonna happen. One day, sooner or later, sex will happen and it will be "a-very-big-deal" and you need to have your wits about you in so that it does not go very wrong."


"One of these days you will want to do things, things that you've been told again and again are all wrong, however, I guarantee (if you are lucky) will actually feel so right. What will you do, then?"

This discovery may be confusing, especially if it's all wrapped up in "liking someone a lot," too.

So, if you start to have sex and it actually feels so natural and right, then the question really is, "how much of this can you do before you absolutely must stop?"

(Well, personally, I believe there are two answers, the "Conservative an Moral" answer is, "Unless you are married, then stop yesterday, and do not proceed further!" Which, sadly, we all know is a concept doomed to fail.

And then there's the realistic answer, or "real one," which I believe is to wait as long as possible, but should you choose to disappoint your mother and "do it" before college, then please, please, please wear a condom, always practice safe sex 100% of the time. And make sure it's with someone who deeply cares about you who deeply trust. (Don't trust them? Don't do it.)

I digress. It's the horror movie in my mind taking over.

Let's backtrack.

Some possible questions kids may have about when to "stop" having sex.

"Will my boyfriend know when to stop?"

"Will my way-sleazier friends tell me? If you don't tell me what to do next, can I ask them for advice?"

"What if I have condoms, but we do things that I know (from "Family Unit") won't get me pregnant."

"So, what kinds of sex are actually, not so safe?"

"Why didn't they tell me what I need to have in order to fully protect myself from pregnancy and disease in those mandatory "Family Unit" classes?"



Most of these kids will not stop mid-act and call Mom to ask her how far they should go. These kids will have to make a judgement call all on their own. So we need to make sure they can make a GOOD CHOICE.


If we do not want to raise very messed up kids, they need to know that sex is, in fact, neither right or wrong.


Sex just is.


It's what allows us to exist as a species and it's a big deal: But, if you do not wear protection during sex you could very well get an STD (just show them a few photos of these!) or HIV (how about a few clips of people who got HIV from unprotected sex) and a baby (interview moms like me on how much fun my own pregnancies were - I will make girls buy stock in Trojans).


Tell them the truth about what real consequences of sex are, and make sure they are emotionally prepared for how tempting it will be to forget to be smart "during that moment." This is the part the educators all leave out. And, it's a pretty important part.

Hello? Here's what they don't tell you in school. Sex is fun. Sometimes, sex can be awful, too. There are probably great discussions that could be had regarding both these subjects.

I, as a parent, can't bear to think of my children "growing up" but refusing to deal with that step is a big mistake. We have to be brave about speaking to our kids. Or risk some dire consequences.

Talk to each other -- and certainly talk to your kids about sex.

That's all I'm saying.

Surely, it will absolutely be awkward to do so, but it's better to have an embarrassing and awkward conversation with your kid than to have a tragic one later, because you chickened out on talking with them before it became "an issue."

I am convinced that it is when people stop talking to each other that bad things happen.


Here's a link to the best piece on this from Gawker regarding Bristol and Levi and the pathetic consequences of mixed messages.

Links to California party endorsements for special election May 2009

Here are a few more links to some other party endorsements -- so you can do more homework on what matters to you for the special election vote later this month.

Link to other alternative party endorsements to round out more info and regarding the May Special Elections.

"Advice To Mothers" by Lucy Pepper

Lucy Pepper is delicious. I love her work!

Advice to mothers from lucy pepper on Vimeo.

Camera reality

I love this animation by Chris Ware from Showtime's This American Life.

It so clearly tells the story of how media changes society. Or rather, how the power to create media changes social dynamics.



Why does trouble always start in the "art room?"

Just so you know, the real story was about some schoolkids who goofed around and made one or two silly, fake video cameras out of card board boxes and toilet paper tubes and then they acted out "filming" each other around the schoolyard. The story goes that this game caught on fast at the school, and had an unfortunate outcome.

The school later responded by banning the cameras.

It's a short animation version of the cable TV show This American Life, and it's very good.

Wait! (sound of screeching tires.) Allison may be perfect for Eric.

-- Whoa!

Just found this clip.

But, now after seeing her sheer joy playing a sultry Ring-mistress, keeping "the rowdy crowds at bay with her lightening quick riding crop." Or whatever that was at (Cirque du So Gay) a Vt. pride/ gay rights celebration sheds an entirely new light on this week's episode of Eric Schaeffer's Vermont date with Allison on "I Can't Believe I'm Still Single."

Yep, I take back what I said before, Allison could very well be perfect for Mr. Eric Schaeffer.

(If he can keep up with her, that is. She really is up his alley, so to speak.)

Check it out.



All potential ego or chemistry clashes aside: This chick does, perhaps, seem quite right for Eric Schaeffer, I do wonder why it didn't seem that apparent to me on his show, though.

I may be a straight, married woman with kids and living in beige-oh Orange County, Ca, but I just have to say this clip demonstrates one more reason why I love so Vermont. People have always done their own thing there, (Like in New Orleans, too, where I was born) and I love that about that about any place. Vermont is like the West Village, but with trees, meadows, streams and all the privacy you want.

I'd love the OC more if it could get more like that, too...*sigh.

I should have been Marlo Thomas's daughter: "Free to be you and me" seems to be my motto, too.

What can I say? I love being around people who know who they are and love who they are, and, I'm sorry, but does this look like a fun part-ay, or what?

So, my call now is either for Lauren or Allison.

But, chemistry is everything, and that's not something I can get from his show.

Louise On The Left's "I Can't Believe...Single" re-cap: Allison and Vermont.

Okay, so I guess I might as well resign myself to the fact that I'm planning to write my own "un-review" for each segment in Season Two of "I Can't Believe I'm Still Single...Portland to Portland."

Why? Because nobody else is, and I'm getting hits on this subject, that's why.

Question: Why is Season Two still being called "I Can't Believe...Portland to Portland" when I have yet to hear of either city in any segment this season?

So, here's my spin on Episode 4, when Eric meets Allison from Vermont.

At the opening of the episode, Allison's friend voiced concern that she does not want people to refer to Allison's date as "the big girl date." Point noted. Not a problem. She was full figured, but also totally gorgeous, and cool. But, I'm going to bet that for Mr. Seeking Ms. Perfect, that deep down he may still have an issue with what he may view as non-perfection due to his known food-control issues.

Uhm, so, yeah -- this week Eric and his jaunty crew road-tripped up to Vermont.

Growing up, I made that trip almost every other weekend. And I can vouch that it isn't a short trip, so I was baffled that it really was all filmed on the same day. If that's accurate, then they had to be exhausted by the end of the date.

The trip must've taken anywhere from four to seven hours just getting to Burlington without stopping, or being stopped for speeding.

It's about three-and-a-half or four from NYC just to the first exit past the Vermont border. (Which happens to be Brattleboro, right off I-91 and, coincidentally, where Schaeffer -- and I -- grew up, and where he spent a good part of his elementary school and high school, years.)

However, in this segment they went all the way up Vermont, first to Burlington, to meet his date, then after dinner, Eric talks her into "taking him" up to Canada to a sex club. (Now that I think of it, there's no human way they could have done that in a day, so this must have been filmed over a few days time.)

Anyhow, I suppose to some that is a romantic way to end a first date, when I was single I may have done bizarre things, so I'll reserve any judgment on this, but I'm not sure if I were a man filming a date that may ("hopefully") lead to "finding the love of my life" that immediately driving to a sex club would be a great way to develop intimacy and trust. But, what do I know?

So, they (all) drove another hour and a half north right to the Canadian border, which, must have been really cold and extremely tedious just to get to a strip joint "across the border." (I just have to ask: Can Canadians really be that much more kinky?)

Anyhow, here's the funniest part, so they all endured this cold, dark, tedious trek just so that Eric could "bring his hot date to a sex club in Canada" however they had to turn around at the border and never even made it. I almost felt sorry for Allison at that point.

And, I'd say, ditto for Eric, but he always has an advantage in the game (it's his show) so, I don't waste sympathy on him since his emotional "quest" is really just a meal ticket.

Now, you have to know something about me: I adore Vermont. I'd move there in an instant if it ever made sense for my husband and my kids to do so. My parents live there and up till a few years ago when the concept of investing in a second home seemed like a normal thing to do, I'd have gladly purchased a particular property I had my eye on for a long time.

But, here we are in an economic meltdown and for better or worse, I'm firmly planted in the fertile soil of Orange County, Ca...Here I can grow great kids, and, yes, even fruit and vegetables. Why not? Groves of all the above.

But, the point I'm making in relation to Eric and Vermont and any girl he may date there: Vermont is perfect and Vermonters are a good reason why that is. Vermont is my utopia and so I'm going to be inclined to think women he dates from Vermont are going to be very cool.

And Allison did seem so.

She certainly has quite a fan club who spoke highly of her to Eric. She lived up the hype that she was a beautiful, extremely open-minded and very seemed to be a what I would call "a real catch" Beauty, brains and a sense of humor, but it could be that for some guys she might even appear to be too independent or brave.

I don't think Eric will fall in love with her, because she's just too intelligent -- However, he'll never admit this fact. She already challenges and will continue to challenge his insecure bullshit and he may try to be open to this, but in the end won't be able to accept this for long. She's as smart, if not smarter than he is. Which isn't great for long term planning. He'd have to embrace this fact to make it work long term. Not going to happen.

She also needs to see that once the romance wears off with Eric that he'll drive her nuts with all his neediness. It's not a long-term relationship that I predict could last.

Also, in spite of trying to act otherwise, I suspect he still wants a model-skinny chick, but he's too embarrassed to admit this shallow fact to his enlightened viewership.

He still wants a yoga-model babe who will have stars in her eyes for him in spite of all his insecurity and self-infatuation. In other words, someone fairly green about men, and I don't mean ecological.

I don't really get one thing though.

Does Allison really know what kind of Pandora's box she's opened by letting the world know how "experimental" she is sexually? It's one thing to tell someone this face-to-face, but going on cable television with this news could be asking for trouble.

I predict that she may not love all the attention she gets as a result of this, especially since she strikes me as another lovely, sensitive woman who may just be channeling her insecurity about weight into something that I doubt she really wants the world to identify her as being.

I just don't buy that she has such a "just sex" side to her, like her buddies insisted she did. (Her Vt. pals said that she'd always list "sex" first in the list Eric grills people with. )*

She did put God first in that list, after all, and I think deep down, she's channeling her sexual energy into things she can control (like sex play) when the sadness of not being able to control so much is out of her hands.

I just felt like all the non-emotional kinky sex talk of hers with Eric, was a red herring in that she is actually, just like Eric, simply for something very solid and boring and real. (Which I can tell you is great, once you accept this reality, especially the having kids part. Trust me. Once she has kids she will NOT want videotape of her talking about drugs, sex, kinkiness or any of that crazy stuff out there on TV. Sorry, but raising kids makes you embrace being beige so fast your head will spin.)

Anyway, I also kind of think she's compensating about, perhaps her appearance, with the hints at her possibly dom sex life. I just hope she doesn't live to regret this. And I don't know why they insisted of making an issue of her weight, because by doing so it made it an issue.

So, I like her, too. So I don't want her to waste her time, because he's someone who can't (insert Jack Nicholson's voice here.) "Can't handle the truth!" -- I think she'll fight with him -- I would.

-- Oh, but, I can't forget this part.

And, hey, I just have to say this, Mark Ebner: Holy crap, you are so lucky I wasn't driving when it was discovered you'd let everyone get to the Canadian border that late at night, without once checking that you brought a passport or even a Social Security card with you?!

Are you kidding? Seriously, lame. This is the same border the terrorists used in order to enter the US to then fly jets from Logan into the World Trade Center.

Ebner believed he could traipse across the border with his drivers license because when Eric asked him what else he had with him since he knew they were headed to Canada: Here's how Ebner responded when asked if he even thought to take his passport or social security card or even birth certificate with him.

Ebner: "Eric, Eric, okay. Here's what I got. I have my Private I. credentials, and I got I'm a best selling New York Times author. And my father's Canadian." -- Oh. Okay, then.

That was so lame, I thought it was staged. I would have dropped you off at the first Vermont Scientology center I could find and told them precisely what stories you wrote about them. You'd be hitching back home if I were driving.

Clearly Allison had to know she was on a road trip with "Dumb and Dumber," at that point, right?

And that Eric didn't kick Ebner out of the car for that blunder proves that Schaeffer must be a very forgiving person.

Especially, since Ebners final comment in the show, was after they all turned around at the border and had to drive back to Burlington since Ebner didn't remember a border crossing involves things like passports, was

"So, you wanna go to that titty club in Montpelier?"


Namaste.




* Oh, here's The "Eric Schaeffer Order of Importance List:"

He always asks his dates to "rank in order of importance" the following:
God
Sex
Money
Love



For me I think that list would be:

1. Love (It's all around me with regard to my husband and kids. It's just there all the time. If I look at my kids I melt with love. I'd throw myself under a train for them. I'd die for them. That's love.)

2. Sex (It's great when it's there.)

3. Money (I already happily live on very little)

4. God (I'm a spiritual agnostic. I'm okay with a concept of God. )


However, I am not a fan of "organized religion." At all. I think Jesus did exist, but if he lived here now, but he'd never stop throwing up seeing what people have done in his name.

Paul Lynde doing local weather report

Just found a great clip of Paul Lynde doing some city's local weather report.

Why did I never see this before? He was so innately funny. "It's 69 in Seattle?"

I'm still trying to figure out why any television producer would agree to let someone like Paul Lynde do their local weather, but who cares? This is hilarious.

Love all the 80's hair and his jangly little gold necklace-tie thing he sports, too. Very nice.